TV

That looks familiar

That’s what I thought when I saw Madonna’s Louis Vuitton ad. Well, that, and “damn, that’s ugly”. Anyway, now I know why it seemed familiar. Bitch totally ripped off Sheena!

POA, TV

Damages: Who’d ya rather?

Heads up, folks. Damages Season 2 starts tomorrow night.
You can watch a recap of S1 on the FX site.

And just for fun, a question that’s nearly impossible to answer:


sports

The highlight of the Bowl season

I don’t pay much attention to Bowl Games unless:

  • A Mississippi team is involved
  • The BCS Title game
  • THE Ohio State University gets rolled
  • I tuned in for the final minute of last night’s game. Man, it’s fun watching them lose!

    It’s so true. THE Ohio State University does indeed SUCK.

dogs, dumbassery

What do you get when you combine teenagers, fireworks, and one hour with no supervision?

Answer: the bright idea to set off 3 bundles of bottle rockets in a pile of dead tree limbs

(Actually there were 5 little bastards involved, ages 8-19)

It happened at the in-laws lake house. We spent Jan 1st there, watching the kids ride motorcycles, left for one hour, and returned to this. They were panicking, but managed to form a water bucket cup brigade. The largest “bucket” was a glass coffee pot, which they broke. The rest were coffee cups and and a tiny tea pot.

They actually did a good job containing it.

Yes, THEY.

We, the 4 responsible adults, parked our asses on tree stumps, popped open some beer, and heckled the little fuckers while they worked. No real harm was done, and I hope they learned a lesson. I know, it’s doubtful.

The only other event thus far in the new year, my dogs ate half a platter of fried chicken last night. Apparently, Sadie is now tall enough to reach things on the kitchen counter. To her credit, she shared with her brother and sister. Julie tried to appear contrite, and Diablo attempted the cuteness defense. Bastards!

Julie ashamed Guilty

Here’s to another year of jackassery.

Syd being smart (?)

Can I get another Amen?

Since I’m devoid of original thought today, I’ll live off the brilliance of others. (I’m also devoid of shame)

From January’s Esquire:

If you want to get laid, don’t take us out for a three-hour, ten-course tasting menu. All we want to do after that is put on boxers and a T-shirt and watch TV. On a special night, screw first.

How fucking true is this?

I’ve cooked my way right out of getting laid by serving a nice dinner. Always, ALWAYS, serve the Beaver first, ladies!

[via Eat Me Daily]

pissy

Amen, Sister

Are you sick of the year end reviews?
This bitch is, and I couldn’t agree more…

From Serious Eats

Why the fuck did I read your site all year when it turns out I can just tune in this week and get an entire year’s worth of shit in my RSS feeder? Enough with the damn reviews clogging things up. I can’t find the new material for all this review shit. Stop it. Stop it now!

—Holli
on vacation with a damn Google reader clogged with stuff I’ve already seen

Well said, Holli.

disgusting, dumbassery

Teach your 5 yr old to hold his liquor

Seriously UK?

Did I read this correctly?

The Government is also reviewing whether the current age at which it is legal to drink should remain at five.

I’m kinda speechless…

————————-

Speaking of booze, I got my drink on Saturday night and started cleaning. Oh BOY, did I clean. I swear to you, I threw more OUT of my closet than I kept.

I’m a little nervous that I got carried away, but not nervous enough to go through those bags again.

I do regret “trimming” the end of my ponytail that was tickling my neck. It wasn’t so cute after I washed my hair. That’s all I’m saying about that.

dirty/nasty stuff that I don't know where else to put

I’m not a fan of poetry

But this one cracked me up…

Cock

Early Morning Cock

There it is again that annoying cock,
the cock I hate and don’t want.
If only I had a box with a lock.
I would throw that cock in there,
lock it up at my convenience.
Oh for the cock I just don’t care.
Is that it again? it sure is.
This morning the cock came.
I don’t know if I could take this.
It never fails the cock makes me mad.
I don’t care what anyone says,
the cock is very bad.

The rest is here.

just fucking funny

Go ahead and place your hand over your mouth

In keeping with the religious theme today:

If you can last until the 1 min mark, white boy cuts a rug for the Lord.

Syd being smart (?)

intellectual discourse

Verbatim email exchange:

Lisa: are you familiar with the card game, Euchre?
SYD: No. But it reminds me that you are a Eunuch.
Lisa: How do you even *know* that fucking word?
SYD: From the Bible, dumbass.
Lisa: oh really, how many men with no dicks in the bible are there?
SYD: Look it up, fucker. I swear!
SYD: BTW, they have dicks. Just no sac

It struck me as a funny convo. Plus, you got your Bible study for the day.

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